Resentment is Toxic
by web of light
Summary: Why was Bucky at Tony's Memorial Service? Why was Sam being so nice to him? Missing Scene One-shot. Complete


Pepper Potts gave the remaining Avengers temporary quarters so they would have some a place to stay until Damage Control could remove the rubble and build a new compound. T'Challa offered Bucky a place at the new Wakandan embassy, but Steve asked him to stay with him. To his surprise, Ms. Potts agreed without blinking an eye. She must know, everyone must know about his history with Tony, but Steve told him the snap caused a massive shifting in priorities.

Steve and Sam were both in somber moods. Sam had softened. His familiar hard-edged snark went silent soon after he heard the news about Natasha. She would sometimes accompany Steve when he visited Wakanda and once, Bucky tried to apologize for those times he shot her, but she refused to listen, telling him upfront she knew it wasn't really him. He wasn't used to people's understanding. He had known her for a small amount of time and if this felt bad; it was no wonder it was so hard on Sam who had fought by her side for so many years. She died so they could get a second chance.

Steve told them the harsh details of the aftermath of the battle, when Thanos won, their empty lives as they tried to piece things together, and how hope came to them by way of the unlikely hero Scott Lang, and the unexpected introduction to a beautiful powerful being of light, who looked like a human woman named Carol Danvers. Steve told them there was more to her than her outward appearance. He went into the detail of their travel through time, which Sam scoffed at but by the time Steve finished, they were both believers. Bucky got the impression Steve was leaving things out but decided not to press it. He would tell them when he was ready.

The evening before the Memorial service everyone gathered together in a large common room waiting for Happy Hogan to go over the details. Bucky felt out-of-place, so he left them there and wondered over a small courtyard garden outside the complex. A shadow fell across him and he looked up, expecting to see Steve or Sam.

It was Pepper Potts. Her appearance surprised him but he collected himself enough to stand up.

"Hello," she said. She gave him a shy smile. "I'm not really sure what to call you…"

"Bucky," he said. Her being here made him nervous.

"Hello, Bucky, you can call me Pepper," and she extended her hand. He stared at it for a few seconds, trying to remember the last person who shook his hand but realized his hesitation might come across as rude. He shook it.

"If you're looking for Steve and the others, they're inside…" he began.

"I know. They told me you were out here," she said. "I came here to invite you to the memorial service tomorrow."

Bucky couldn't believe what he had heard. "Excuse me?" he asked.

"I'd like you to be there," she said. Her tone was firm, and she looked him in the eyes.

"But, I can't. You must know what happened…"

"I know all about it."

"But how can you… I don't understand."

She smiled and for the first time, looked away, her eyes blinking. "Tony was angry for a long time, but things started to change after Morgan was born. The passage of time made him...more reflective. He found your journals and read them, he found your Hydra files. Even though he never said it, because of what happened after the first snap, I know he was sorry he never got the chance to let you know. He wouldn't tell you himself, he'd probably leave that to me or Happy, but he understood and accepted your circumstances."

Bucky let that sit in his mind for a few moments. "And I understood his."

The smile returned. "I know, Steve told me." She took the time to stare at the pavement in front of her before looking him in the eyes again. "Morgan will be there. She's very young, but someday, she'll know everything. I don't intend to hide anything from her, I don't intend to lie. We know what hiding the truth can do. She will know what happened to her grandparents, what happened to her father, and what happened to you. She will know why I wanted you at her father's memorial, because her father let go of his anger, and of his resentment, and she will know you were not responsible for your actions, and who the real bad guys were. I don't her to fall into the trap of believing revenge is necessary or blaming the wrong people. I want her to look out for the innocent. I wish Tony could have told you this, but he had difficulty with actually saying… things like this out loud. So please come, for Morgan's sake, and to send everyone else a message. We can let go."

Bucky took a moment to let her words sink in. This was a woman determined to break the cycle and bring things together, instead of tearing them apart. "If you think it'll help, I'll be there."

She smiled again, blinking rapidly. "Thank you,' she said her voice breaking. She turned and disappeared into the building.

Everyone he knew was there, and there were a lot of people he didn't. They all knew who he was. His attendance at the event was met with some raised eyebrows, and there were more questions when Pepper greeted him warmly and thanked him for coming. She didn't introduce her daughter, but he caught her looking up at him. He smiled at her and she smiled back. He hoped she would remember.

Sam was being especially understanding which was a bit disorienting. He was very solicitous, looking out for him, making sure things didn't get to be too much for him, even during that one point when he was filled with overwhelming regret. Bucky accepted this new Sam but wasn't sure if this behavior would last. After it was over, Steve and the other group gathered together in the house, so the two of them took the time to walk down to the edge of the lake.

"So, what are you doing to do, after this?" Sam asked.

Bucky shrugged. "I guess, go back to Wakanda if they'll have me. Its home now."

"Don't blame you. That's your safe place, or it was. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. We can hardly pick up where we left off. I've got...lots of things to think about. You know, they told me that Thanos was different from the one we fought earlier. He was younger, from a different timeline. Somewhere, there's a place where he doesn't exist."

"I'm not surprised at much anymore. I wish I could go there… I could tell Stark… we could get some kind of closure on everything."

"Maybe he knows," Sam said.

"What?"

"With all this time travel and multidimensional quantum realm hopping, maybe somewhere there's a place where he knows."

"It would be nice," Bucky said. Up toward the house, he saw Morgan Stark walking hand in hand with Happy Hogan. "I hope so."

"I think now, would be a good time for starting over," Sam said. 'All those misunderstandings, jealousies… leave them in the past."

"I was never jealous of you," Bucky protested.

'Yeah, you were," Sam said, but he wasn't arguing, his words had a mischievous ring to them. "You come back and Cap had a new best friend…"

"You're friends with Cap. I'm best friends with Steve Rogers."

"Oh, it's like that now, is it?"

"It's exactly like that," Bucky said, using the same joking tone Sam had used. He looked over and smiled at him, for the first time in his life. Everyone was right. It was time to start over.

Over in the middle of the lake, Tony Stark's memorial floated on the quiet water.


End file.
